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Ice Princess
She was an ice princess. Not because she was cold, not
at all. But she was perfectly beautiful in a crystalline way, and had a
certain sharpness about her that made your senses tingle. Apparently, she
made everyone's senses (and some other parts) tingle, too, but she never
noticed. She was too busy being incredible, and, well, incredibly busy.
Ice as she was, it seemed if she ever stopped going she'd melt.
I found her crying icicles into her April snowstorm. Pale
and beautiful, though her eyes were turning red, I held her as her world
shattered and let the sharp shards pierce me until the soft snow had
silently covered over the cracks. I fell in love, and when I say I fell in
love, I mean I fell head first into a waist-deep snowdrift of it. She and
her icicle tears and windsong breath had given me a purpose, and as her
world shattered, mine finally congealed. I wrapped her in something warm
and black, not realizing she might melt.
And melt she did, I suppose. It was long and slow, but after
almost two years of rocky adolescent love where I'd do anything for her,
the thaw came with the worst possible timing. My ice princess became a
real girl, vulnerable and soft, and I became a young woman, out to prove
myself to the world at large, and myself. I wasn't there when she
discovered her own flesh, sickly and pale. She found she had feelings, not
just sparkling visions, and she began to scrape the mud off them.
Under layers of mud she found pain. It wasn't the kind of
pain that could be silenced by an insulating layer of snow, either. My
once-ice princess, now-girl was crying liquid tears like a storm and I had
no idea what to do. I had only just learned to swim by myself after she
had saved me from drowning. She was real and she needed me in a way so
many people had so many times before, but this wasn't the way it was
supposed to work. Fairy tales were only allowed one scary bit and we'd
already had ours. As much as I had become the solid one, she was supposed
to be ethereal, not broken and scared and human like everyone else.
And finally I'd realized what I could and couldn't do, that
I couldn't save everyone like she had saved me. And this was a fracture a
few encouraging kisses wouldn't heal. She needed time, and time was the
only thing I couldn't give her. I left her in the care of old friends and
new, because though her icy wings had fallen off, I was just about to
finally fly.
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