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Welcome to The Shmoo Archive, a tribute to goons, thugs and thick-necked men everywhere. A Shmoo can be what, in hockey parlance, is commonly called a "goon," but it's typical of me that I can't just say what everyone else is saying. Besides, "goon" isn't heard much outside the hockey world and there are Shmoos (seemingly) everywhere. What's more, "goon" has sort of a negative, threatening connotation -- hockey goons are usually enforcers, whereas Shmoos are more...cuddly. Imagine Winnie the Pooh in a bad mood. Time magazine (October 25, 1993) referred to the Philadelphia Phillies' John Kruk as "the Shmoo-shaped first baseman who tore his pants lunging for a ball...and, either defiantly or absentmindedly, left his underwear on display for the next seven innings." I suspect this may have been the first use of the term in a national publication, and I suppose in John Kruk's case it sums up the very essence of Shmooeyness as well.

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Mark Recchi,
seen here in
Penguin days


Tom Brunansky,
Twins/Cards/Sox/
Brewers slugger


Roger Clemens,
a Shmooey hurler
(and more of Roger)

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